“This post is brought to you by The Stork OTC and The Motherhood. All opinions are my own.”
I will be the first to admit that I am blessed to have wonderful pregnancies and 3 beautiful babies to show for them. Not everybody has those experiences though. During my first pregnancy, I was doubly excited because my very best friend was pregnant with her third baby at the same time. We spoke almost daily to check in with each other and see how things were going, sharing stories, struggles, or just unload our hormone unbalance on each other. These conversations were some of the best parts of my day until the day she called to tell me she had had a miscarriage. My heart ached for her. I wanted to fly out there and fix it, but the truth is, I couldn’t. I couldn’t make it go away. I couldn’t take away the pain she felt seeing a pregnant woman on the street or even what she undoubtedly had to feel as she talked with me daily. During that pregnancy, she had 3 miscarriages. The one I remember most was the one where she called me just before my due date. Even through her pain, she wanted to make sure I could celebrate my baby being born without worrying about her.
The strength of our friendship amazed me. I knew how scared I felt every time I had bleeding during that pregnancy. I couldn’t imagine what she was going through. I wanted to ask questions, sometimes I did. Sometimes I didn’t because I didn’t want to open fresh wounds. I didn’t want to bring up unpleasant topics and to be honest, I had no clue how to talk to her or what to say about it all. Since then, I’ve learned a few things. One of those is how insensitive I was at times without even knowing it or meaning to be. I wanted to share some of the things I have learned about how to talk with a friend who has struggled with infertility or miscarriage. Here are some things you SHOULD say.
Tell them you care. This may be the most important thing. Let them know you are available and ready to listen if they want to talk about it.
Ask them how you can help and mean it.
Remember them on Mother’s Day or Father’s Day. Not having a baby in their arms may make these days especially hard. Be there for them.
Help out with the older siblings if necessary. Don’t try to reassure them that having kids already makes this easier for them. It doesn’t. At least not entirely.
Pray with them. Pray for them.
Listen. Just listen. And really hear what they are saying.
Do your research. You know they are struggling. They know they are struggling. Whether they already have or aren’t ready yet, eventually they will probably want to talk about it. Be prepared for that conversation. Whether they are looking at other options or planning to give up, be prepared. Know what these options are and what they mean. Know the at home methods, the more complex procedures, surrogates, all of it. It’s going to be a sensitive situation, so try to make it easier.
Maybe at this point they have tried to conceive naturally but now have to start looking at other options. One place to start is The Stork OTC. The Stork OTC is the only conception assistance device cleared by the FDA for over the counter sales without a prescription. Using cervical cap insemination, The Stork allows you to increase your chances of conception privately from your own home. This makes it a great first step before trying more expensive, more invasive methods to conceive.
Using a condom like sheath with a cervical cap inside, it collects the semen. Then, using the applicator, you can deliver this semen to the outside of the cervix. By using this during the ovulatory phase of the menstrual cycle, The Stork OTC can help aid in conception.
Whatever method your friend chooses, being there is what they need the most. Knowing they have somebody in their corner to listen, to understand, to make decisions may be what that friend truly needs.
May all of your baby making dreams come true.
If you think The Stork OTC may be the right product for you or someone you know, now is your chance to win a trial of The Stork OTC. Giveaway ends at 11:59 pm EST on October 6, 2015. Open to US only. Good luck!